Egg Tree

An Egg Tree is a small manmade "fruit" tree not found in the wild. It's primarily used by professional chefs and bakers, who keep them as a reliable source of freshly grown eggs. Breeders of reptiles, birds, and even amphibians may use egg trees, but the growing of living beings from egg trees is unreliable and sometimes seen as inhumane or unethical due to the high chance of genetic mutations. Egg trees are not very well researched, being a relatively new invention.

History
On Apr 9, 2019, the YouTube channel "Five-Minute Crafts Girly" posted a video containing a debunked recipe for "growing your own egg tree". This inspired 4 scientists at MIT to create their own version as a joke. According to lead scientist and owner of 2 Nobel Prizes, Tobias Cranapple III, they "tested the recipe with an experimental and unstable lab-grown egg whos DNA originated in a glacial sample found in Antarctica, expectations low. But within 7 days of the initial planting/incubation period, [they] were surprised to find a sprout had grown". Further testing of the sprout confirmed that it was indeed alive and growing fast. It was then carefully watched over and taken care of until 2 months later, when it sprouted the very first round of tree-grown eggs. "Ah, the miracle of life. So beautiful," noted Tobias during a 2021 interview.

Since then, a wide-ass variety of egg trees began spreading over the world, all originating from this egg tree. Currently, the original egg tree is housed in an undisclosed area in Area 51 after concerns filed by the FDA. Testing done on the progeny of the original egg tree and subsequent generations were deemed "probably safe enough" for human consumption, and remain a staple of countless chefs cuisine.

Biological, or fertile egg trees, are an invention with very little research done on them. The anti-bio-egg movement of 2022 fought against the normalization of this. For more information, visit the MIT website for their stance.

Materials

 * >4 day old egg tree "seed"
 * 5-10 inch clay pot with drainage
 * Salt and Pepper infused soil1
 * Water with a pH of 5.5 and low ammonia

1 Salt and Pepper infused soil was made specifically for egg tree growth. If you don't have access to this, manually mix 5 tablespoons of both salt and pepper per 2 cups of regular soil until homogeneous.

Initial Planting

 * 1) Fill your clay pot about 4/5ths of the way with soil. Pour a tablespoon or 3 of water to dampen the soil beforehand. Create a small hole in the center about 2 inches deep. This will be where your egg tree will go.
 * 2) Begin by acquiring a >4 day old egg tree seed. During this stage, the shell membrane should not quite be completely hardened, and should have a softness to it. Gently as not to harm the internal "yolk", crack the membrane and make sure all the internal gooeys are intact.
 * 3) Take a pinch of salt and pepper, and sprinkle it over the "yolk". If you're using salt and pepper infused soil, you can skip this step. Take the remains of the egg membrane and break it down into small pieces. Put the shell pieces on top of the seed. Then, cover it all gently with the soil and pat it down. The egg shell acts as an extra source of nutrients for the growing sprout.
 * 4) The soil should already be damp from step 1, but add a small amount of extra water to give it a little kickstart.

Sprout to Youngling
Keep your clay pot in a humid, hot environment for the first 3 weeks. Try to keep a steady temperature of 83 degrees Fahrenheit. (Every 2 days, sprinkle 4 tablespoons of water and make sure it doesn't come in contact with bugs or other creatures that could harm its development. Make sure the water matches the materials, or it may die young. A hygrometer may be a good investment for people who want to raise multiple egg trees at a time.

Youngling to Adult
Once the beginnings of a trunk begin to form, and the egg tree can sit upright, you don't have to worry quite as much. Healthy egg trees will grow to be about 3-4 feet tall. At this point, you may remove the pot from the warm area and put it in an area with partial sun. Soon, it will begin to produce eggs. im too tired to write more